1 Minute Sample : "As I Live and Grieve podcast" features Messages from our Furry Friends, and more with Rob Gutro

 New Podcast: "As I Live and Grieve podcast" features Messages from our Furry Friends, and more with Rob Gutro Listen on Apple Podcasts 

LISTEN TO THE FULL PODCAST HERE:  https://tinyurl.com/se7nm4bm  

Words of Comfort When You Lose a Loved One

    As a medium, it's a little easier for me to get messages from spirits of people and pets who have passed away. However, everyone has the ability, and that's why I wrote my books - to teach you how to recognize those signs.
    Often during the holidays, people choose to pass because they know their family members are around, and it's a season of hope and light. They want us to understand they're in the light, and at a place of peace. They don't want us to grieve so deeply that we can't function in our own lives. Recently a friend's father passed away, and here is what I told her- and it's something you can share with others dealing with loss:

 Your dad can now keep watch over you and your family, having found peace from pain. He's now going to around you all, surrounding you with love. Keep his memories alive and take time to heal. The physical loss leaves us with an emptiness, but his love will always fill that space in your heart. You'll find yourself and others saying something or doing something your dad did, and at that moment you'll know he's still with you. - Rob Gutro

6 Things to say to people experiencing grief

Sometimes it's really difficult to know what to say to people who are grieving the loss of a loved one whether it be
a person or pet who passed. Whenever I give my lectures, everyone in the room is grieving for someone. As a medium, finding things to say is a bit easier for me, because I sometimes get messages from spirit at the right time, but for those who don't, I thought this article would help you respond. 
   Another way you can help them get through their grief is to teach them how spirits communicate from the other side, and how they can recognize signs. That's what my books are about! - So, for people grieving a person, send them "Ghosts and Spirits" or "Lessons Learned from Talking to the Dead." If they're grieving a pet, send them "Pets and the Afterlife" or "Pets and the Afterlife 2" by Rob Gutro   

Now, here are the Six Helpful Things You Can Do/Say if Someone You Know Is Grieving:

1. Ask, "How are you doing?" Then listen patiently to the answer without changing the subject or terminating the conversation. Create a safe space for them to talk about their experience if they would like to. You might feel honored that they trusted you enough to give an honest answer if it's something other than "Fine."
2. Say that you just found out about their loss. Rather than the obligatory "I'm sorry for your loss," or "I'm sorry that your marriage didn't work out for you," try this instead: "I can't imagine what this is like for you," followed by "How are you doing?" Everyone's grief is different. Even if you've experienced loss, you don't know how they feel. Let them tell you about it in their own words.
3. Stay away from offering clichés like, "You were lucky to have the time you had," "She's with the angels now," etc. It doesn't help to have you try to rationalize away someone's grief. If you're not sure what to say, go back to tip #2 above.
4. "I'd like to help. Would you like me to __________?" Insert specific tasks that you are willing to do that you think might be helpful. You could suggest something like "mow the lawn, walk the dog, watch the baby, sit with you, help you clear the garage," etc. Then show up and do it if the answer is "Yes." Try to avoid the offhand, "Let me know if there is anything I can do for you." No one believes you really mean it and that puts the burden on the griever to think of something for you to do. They don't have the energy for that.
5. When someone cries in front of you, all you have to do is stay put and say something in a soothing voice like, "It's OK....let that out....I'm here for you." Comforting them with a touch on the arm or a hug is great too. Just do your best to stay present and don't try to "fix" it. Don't hand them a tissue unless they ask for it. The tears will come to a natural completion of their own accord.
6. Do your best to keep your relationship intact. Avoiding a grieving person because it's uncomfortable for you to be with them is hard for them. You can imagine the feelings of isolation they would be feeling if everyone in their lives reacted this way. It's OK to say the name of the person that is gone. It's OK to ask what happened. It's OK to talk about the strangeness of it all. It's even OK to cry in front of them or with them. Your silence and avoidance is what's really painful.

People experiencing grief crave feeling heard, seen, understood. They need to know that they aren't alone. Know that your love and empathy will go a long way towards supporting a grieving person in their deepest time of need. Know that they would do it for you, too.
SOURCE: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/carrie-doubts/6-tips-for-supporting-people-in-grief_b_9350448.html? 

What to say to people experiencing grief

Sometimes it's really difficult to know what to say to people who are grieving the loss of a loved one whether it be
a person or pet who passed.  Recently the Huffington Post published the following article to help and I'm posting it here to help.


Six Helpful Things You Can Do/Say if Someone You Know Is Grieving:

1. Ask, "How are you doing?" Then listen patiently to the answer without changing the subject or terminating the conversation. Create a safe space for them to talk about their experience if they would like to. You might feel honored that they trusted you enough to give an honest answer if it's something other than "Fine."
2. Say that you just found out about their loss. Rather than the obligatory "I'm sorry for your loss," or "I'm sorry that your marriage didn't work out for you," try this instead: "I can't imagine what this is like for you," followed by "How are you doing?" Everyone's grief is different. Even if you've experienced loss, you don't know how they feel. Let them tell you about it in their own words.
3. Stay away from offering clichés like, "You were lucky to have the time you had," "She's with the angels now," etc. It doesn't help to have you try to rationalize away someone's grief. If you're not sure what to say, go back to tip #2 above.
4. "I'd like to help. Would you like me to __________?" Insert specific tasks that you are willing to do that you think might be helpful. You could suggest something like "mow the lawn, walk the dog, watch the baby, sit with you, help you clear the garage," etc. Then show up and do it if the answer is "Yes." Try to avoid the offhand, "Let me know if there is anything I can do for you." No one believes you really mean it and that puts the burden on the griever to think of something for you to do. They don't have the energy for that.
5. When someone cries in front of you, all you have to do is stay put and say something in a soothing voice like, "It's OK....let that out....I'm here for you." Comforting them with a touch on the arm or a hug is great too. Just do your best to stay present and don't try to "fix" it. Don't hand them a tissue unless they ask for it. The tears will come to a natural completion of their own accord.
6. Do your best to keep your relationship intact. Avoiding a grieving person because it's uncomfortable for you to be with them is hard for them. You can imagine the feelings of isolation they would be feeling if everyone in their lives reacted this way. It's OK to say the name of the person that is gone. It's OK to ask what happened. It's OK to talk about the strangeness of it all. It's even OK to cry in front of them or with them. Your silence and avoidance is what's really painful.

People experiencing grief crave feeling heard, seen, understood. They need to know that they aren't alone. Know that your love and empathy will go a long way towards supporting a grieving person in their deepest time of need. Know that they would do it for you, too.
SOURCE: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/carrie-doubts/6-tips-for-supporting-people-in-grief_b_9350448.html?
This post is part of Common Grief, a Healthy Living editorial initiative. Grief is an inevitable part of life, but that doesn't make navigating it any easier. The deep sorrow that accompanies the death of a loved one, the end of a marriage or even moving far away from home, is real. But while grief is universal, we all grieve differently. So we started Common Grief to help learn from each other. Let's talk about living with loss. If you have a story you'd like to share, email us at strongertogether@huffingtonpost.com.

A Resource: Association for Pet Loss and Bereavement (website)

Since I've published my third book "Pets and the Afterlife" so many people have reached out for comfort. I recently found a website about an organization that also provides comfort: the Association for Pet Loss and Bereavement.
  They have chat rooms,  events, aftercare, information about euthanasia, newsletters, quality of life, products, support, training and much more. 
  If you've lost a pet and are suffering, please contact them. 
Also, please consider a read of my book "Pets and the Afterlife" so you can learn how to see the signs that our pet's spirits are giving us. There's nothing more comforting knowing that our pets remain with us from the other side - Rob

 
FROM THEIR WEBSITE: 
    We are all professionally trained volunteers in pet bereavement counseling, and are here for you. Our beloved animal friends have brought us together, and in honor of them we are now all here for each other, as well. Welcome.
    The APLB is unique, and the only organization in the world doing all this. Our services are free and available to anyone bereaving for a beloved pet. We pride ourselves in incorporating the collective wisdom and experience of all our friends and members. And we make that freely available to anyone who can use it, during deep bereavement for a beloved pet.
Membership is not required for this, but we hope you will Join us.
We need your support to help us expand the many services we are providing
 *********************************
Summary: PETS AND THE AFTERLIFE by Rob Gutro: The loss of a pet is like the loss of a child to pet owners. The love we share with our pets never dies, and in a new book called "Pets and the Afterlife" by Rob Gutro, the author provides proof that our pets do communicate with us from the other side.    Available in paperback and E-book, on Amazon.com and other outlets at: To order paperback of Kindle- http://tinyurl.com/mqgamq2%20